Now that’s a catchy tune!

Well, sort of. Catchy in that, dear lord I can’t get it out of my head (get it out of my head!) kind of way. Infomercials (which I love dearly) are often guilty of ridiculous soundtracks, but this list includes some more mainstream products as well. It seems that this economic downturn has finally reached the product jingle department; either that, or they’ve evolved into a deadly combination of cocky and lazy. Either way, recent ads have left me wishing and hoping that Barry Manilow gets back to his roots and starts composing songs for ads again. And I can safely say that’s the first time I’ve ever had a wish that included Barry Manilow.

Scene: Windowless basement board room with an old piano in the corner. A bunch of guys are sitting around the table staring off into space. At least one of them has a large coffee stain on the front of his shirt and/or pants.
Dude #1: “What’s the product again?”
Dude #2: “It’s a pillow.”
Dude #3: “No, it’s a pet.”
Dude #2: “Well, it’s sort of a pillow-pet.”
Dude #1: “I smell a jingle!”

Forget about the fact that the ad uses such awful characters (the sweet but helpless husband/boyfriend & the wife/girlfriend who is apparently too dumb to be trusted with simple tasks like purchasing toilet paper). Ignore the (possibly Charmin-induced) 3 Bears storyline. Focus instead on the way they turned their tagline into the fine print from a car commercial by cramming 10 syllables into 4 seconds. If time is money, they’re really pinching pennies with this one.

When your whole commercial is a jingle, you need some serious focus during the composition process. Unfortunately for Huggies, it would seem their music team received this assignment on brownie day in the office cafeteria and subsequently spent most of the afternoon eating Cheetos and giggling. Although, if the Man-ilow were to cover it…

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